From: Shelley
26-June-2005-15:05:20

A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest chemical element yet known to
science. The new element has been tentatively named Governmentium.

Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons,
giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of
lepton-like particles called peons.

Since governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with
which it comes into contact.

A minute amount of governmentium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would normally take
less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which
a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, governmentium's mass will actually
increase over time, since each reorganization will cause some morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that governmentium is formed whenever
morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as Critical Morass.